Chapter 400: Choice (2) (End)
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Even after returning to my home, I continued to look at those talents.
Happiness.
Truth.
Asking me to choose between the two was far too harsh a demand.
Naturally, I was curious about both.
Happiness in the truest sense.
Truth in the truest sense.
Happiness probably did not refer merely to being soaked in pleasure. Of course, I considered myself sufficiently happy even now. However, upon seeing happiness embedded as a God Grade talent, I fell into the doubt that happiness in the truest sense might be a realm I did not know.
Opportunities to feel ‘I am happy’ at a given moment are not numerous. When eating delicious food it is ‘delicious,’ when seeing exquisite scenery it is ‘marvelous,’ and when making love, consciousness simply fades away.
I, too, had not properly established a definition for happiness. Whether happiness was a state of a human, or part of emotion.
In truth, thoughts regarding happiness were relatively brief. The moment I saw the word Truth in the Martial Talent Shop, my heart pounded and thrilled.
Truth. Things I was curious about but could never know. The mysteries of the universe. The intentions of nature. The existence of gods. The will of gods. Beyond those, there were countless curiosities, but they were pieces of information bounded by my limits to know.
I had always been an explorer of truth, but currently had merely paused upon feeling the limits of being human. Curiosity toward truth was something that fundamentally set a person’s chest racing.
“Haa.”
Truth and happiness. No matter how much I thought, the fact that it was an either-or choice was truly malicious.
Choosing happiness meant losing truth, and choosing truth meant losing happiness.
Right now, I could choose anything. Because the price was free. It only required my will.
However, I decided not to choose immediately. For now, I wanted to go around and ask the people around me.
First, Senior Brother Myeong-gyeong.
“Senior Brother, are you happy?”
That was my first question. While training, Myeong-gyeong wiped his sweat and looked at me dumbfoundedly.
“What do you mean by that?”
“Literally what it means. I became curious whether you are happy.”
“Well. In truth, having so many worries, I cannot say I am happy.”
“What worries do you have?”
“This time, the Gathering of Dragons and Phoenixes is being held again under the auspices of the New Justice Association. I want to achieve some results there, you see.”
“If it is Senior Brother, would it not be fully possible?”
I knew how much potential Myeong-gyeong possessed as a martial artist. Even so, that was separate from worries about the future.
“In the first place, I don’t really know what happiness is either.”
“It is ambiguous, isn’t it? In truth, I don’t know well either.”
“Then why did you ask?”
“Indeed. Then what about truth?”
“Go away without uttering useless nonsense. I told you I have to practice for the Gathering of Dragons and Phoenixes.”
I was driven away by Myeong-gyeong. I thought it was understandable since Senior Brother Myeong-gyeong was still young.
Immediately, I sought out Master. Cheong-hwa welcomed me gladly the moment he saw me.
“This damned disciple visits whenever he is about to be forgotten.”
“Is that not far better than visiting after having forgotten?”
“To think this is the Emperor of this nation. Truly deplorable.”
Cheong-hwa sighed. Naturally, it was a joke. Because I had strictly instructed everyone not to treat me as Emperor. Especially outside of official settings.
Though they might not realize it, because it was thanks to them that I defeated the Heavenly Demon, they were my life’s benefactors. My skin was not thick enough to receive extreme honorifics from my life’s benefactors.
“By the way, what brings you here this time?”
“Do I only visit when there is business?”
“Is that not always the case?”
“That is true. A curiosity suddenly came to mind.”
“I knew it. What is it?”
Cheong-hwa smiled wryly.
“Master, are you happy right now?”
“Hm?”
Cheong-hwa tilted his head. It seemed he had not expected to receive such a question after all. But unlike Myeong-gyeong, Cheong-hwa answered easily.
“I am happy.”
“Oh. I see. Why is that?”
“Disciples are growing well, peace has visited the martial world, and is it not a peaceful era? If this is not happiness, what could be happiness?”
“I see. Then what about truth?”
“Why truth again?”
“Because I am curious about Master’s opinion on truth.”
“What kind of sudden Zen riddle is this?”
While grumbling like that, Cheong-hwa pondered quite seriously for me. And soon, an answer emerged from Cheong-hwa’s mouth.
“I do not know either. Had I known truth, would I be acting like this?”
“As expected, right?”
“What do you mean ‘as expected’? Even when saying the same words……”
Cheong-hwa clicked his tongue. I immediately bowed and gave a polite greeting.
“Since your curiosity has cleared, are you leaving immediately?”
“Well, something like that.”
“Hmph. Begone.”
“I will visit again next time.”
Promising a future meeting in that manner, I departed. In the end, there was no answer that could be called a gain.
Indeed. How many people could clearly answer regarding such ambiguous matters? Rather, a person who answered definitely would be a fraud.
I returned home. Upon returning home, Peng Chae-hyang was cooking. Since we had married, we had come to live together.
“Ah, Brother. You’ve come. Please taste the seasoning.”
“Okay.”
I scooped the soup with a small spoon and tasted it. And immediately coughed violently.
“Cough, cough! Isn’t it too salty?”
“Ah, really? It is fine. If it is salty, we can just add more water.”
As if accustomed, Peng Chae-hyang began pouring water in abundance. Soon, the pot was filled to the point of nearly overflowing.
“……We could eat this for two months.”
At my mutter, Peng Chae-hyang glared at me. I had no choice but to shut my mouth immediately. Now she was not a younger sister I cherished or a lover, but truly my lifelong companion.
Having learned only saber arts and office work in her youth, she was completely ignorant regarding domestic affairs, including cooking. Of course, having retired as Emperor, I too was equally unaware of what an ordinary head of household should do.
Lifting the spoon again, I checked the seasoning. This time, it had become bland. As expected, Peng Chae-hyang familiar added salt.
“I originally intended to eat this for just one day.”
Peng Chae-hyang muttered. Because pouring water when salty and adding salt when bland was repeated, even the pot had become full.
“Ah, Chae-hyang. More than that, there is something I want to ask.”
“What is it?”
“What could truth be?”
“Did you drink liquor before coming?”
Peng Chae-hyang immediately sniffed around. But there was no way a smell would arise. Because I hadn’t drank alcohol.
“I didn’t drink alcohol.”
“Then what kind of question is that? I thought we were in some Buddhist temple hall.”
“I just became curious.”
“Well. Is there anyone who isn’t curious about truth?”
“That is true.”
I agreed.
“Then what about happiness?”
“Happiness?”
“Yeah. Chae-hyang, are you happy right now?”
“Until just a moment ago I was happy, but because the soup became salty again, I have become unhappy.”
“Ah.”
I suddenly thought: Could choosing happiness mean remaining continuously in a state of happiness? For right now, Peng Chae-hyang was expressing happiness as part of emotion.
“Understood.”
“Come out to eat dinner in a little bit!”
As I entered the room, Peng Chae-hyang shouted from the kitchen. I replied and went back into the room.
Thereafter, I read books by ancient sages that mentioned happiness and truth. Of course, there was nothing particularly helpful.
In truth, no matter how much I rolled my thoughts, an answer could not possibly emerge. The origins of happiness and truth were core matters so vital in the world as to be God Grade. Attempting to know without having bought the talent was itself a conscienceless act.
Speaking to Peng Chae-hyang, I went out for a brief stroll. I figured getting some fresh air might organize my thoughts.
Right now, my head was bifurcated between truth and happiness.
I passed by farmers weeding in fields, merchants selling goods, martial artists carrying swords, strongmen demonstrating strength feats, actors performing plays, and storytellers unraveling entertaining tales.
The Central Plains was peaceful. To the point where one wondered if it was alright to be this peaceful.
Because the troublemaking Blood Cult was gone, and relations with the Great Desert, with which they had constantly clashed, had become amicable, it was natural.
The same went for the orthodox and unorthodox factions. Though orthodox and unorthodox factions still growled at each other, they carried out their respective duties in their respective places. They said Fighting Exalt Jang Gwang-yeong had become the new Leader of the Private Martial Alliance.
The way I had influenced politics, if at all, was lifting the sea-ban order. Because by permitting the sea, Central Plains culture was bound to flourish even further.
That judgment proved completely accurate; in fact, right now Guangdong was said to already exude an exotic atmosphere distinct from the Central Plains.
Everything was perfect.
A beautiful wife.
A peaceful nation.
It was truly cultivating the self, regulating the family, governing the state, and bringing peace to all under heaven. Yet why did one corner of my heart feel adrift and hollow? Was it because I was fixated on happiness and truth?
“Truth, huh.”
In truth, the side I was more fixated upon was truth. Happiness was closely intertwined with life, but my intuition told me that if not now, I might never have the opportunity to know truth.
And I felt it: That choosing truth would alter all thoughts and conventional notions within me. That, too, was an unsettling factor.
“Haa.”
Picking up grass lying nearby, I fashioned a grass flute. Because it had been a long time since I blew one, sound did not emerge well.
Amidst the setting sun, there was no one on the hill. I had an intuition: Right now was the time to choose between truth and happiness.
In any case, even if I agonized or asked others, the answer would not change.
“Right.”
I brought up the Martial Talent Shop.
[ Truth ― God Grade ]
[ Price : Free ]
[ Happiness ― God Grade ]
[ Price : Free ]
[ You cannot purchase both talents. Please choose carefully. ]
Once again, that phrase appeared. And I was seized by another intuition: That this would be the last with the Martial Talent Shop.
Because I did not think there would be any talent left to sell beyond this.
“…….”
I slowly raised my hand.
On the left was Truth.
On the right was Happiness.
Pressing that text would complete the purchase.
With a trembling hand……
I pressed Happiness.
Truth—I was truly curious, but truth carried risks. Because it felt as though the person that was me would change from the very foundation.
If that changed, the relationships with Chae-hyang who currently loved me, Senior Brother Myeong-gyeong, Master, and others could change as well.
I did not want that.
Even so, it was not that I had no expectations for happiness. I was curious about happiness as well.
The text of the Martial Talent Shop blurred and vanished. I looked around myself. I thought that upon buying the talent, the definition of happiness or the like would be hammered into my head. Because talents bought from the Martial Talent Shop until now had all applied immediately.
“……?”
However, nothing had changed. There was nothing newly learned. Nor did any part of my body change.
Wondering if it might activate a bit late, I sat quietly on the hill and blew the grass flute. The sunset was setting beautifully, drifting along the river water. Though a personal impression, the sunset was most beautiful right before it set.
Yet whether a quarter-hour passed or half an hour passed, nothing changed.
“……Hehe.”
A self-deprecating chuckle emerged without my realizing it.
Flicking the grass flute, I sent it drifting away into the river water. Because the time Peng Chae-hyang told me to come eat dinner had arrived, I could no longer loiter on the hill.
[The End]